CD30 - Trying to get by...

So I'm on Day 30...nothing to get excited bout cos my cycle is a 31 or 32 dayer...I'm trying not to lose hope...I really am...I'm just not looking forward to Thursday. It's gonna be a Hellish day anyway due to this horrible annoying case I have a hearing for that day. And we all know how my mood is if I start...and that's when I'm expected to start...so...um...yeah...Thursday I may be "sick"...I know I won't be cos it's my case and I have to be here for it. I can't avoid being a grown up.

I had another negative test yesterday...I didn't test this morning. I just couldn't start out my day with another negative. I have a few more strip tests...I may do another in the morning. I have a digital one that's supposed to predict up to 5 days prior to a missed period...and I could take that one...but I can't handle the words coming up Not Pregnant...I just can't. I'm not cramping yet so that's good. I have analyzed my past few months of tracking and noticed some differences...don't know if they really mean anything yet...but I just have to sit and wait...I hate waiting.

I'm doing my best at waiting...keeping myself distracted...work has been very helpful with that and I mean that in a bad way. We are pretty busy right now and most of the cases involve people who are very head strong and stubborn. So we will see what that does for them.

Mikey got me the new Mario Galaxy 2 and we played for a few hours last night and got 5 stars...lol...they upped the difficulty a bit and my neck hurts from having to figure out all the planet's gravities...plus I just get tense...But it's a fun game and so far we're having fun. Tonight I want to get in the pool some and maybe get to work on finishing the Nikky quilt. All I got to do is sew the binding on and then hand stitch it in place...

Mom gave me some good ideas on a new crazy quilt and I may be trying to see what I can do on that soon...her's is looking really awesome. It has me intrigued...so alas another project to distract me.

I really felt the need to blog yesterday but I could barely find time to tend to my facebook pets so I didn't get to it. So I'm here today hoping it helps my mind to do a little bit of a data dump here so maybe it'll be off my mind...yeah right. It was worth a shot. Spirit Pig continues to travel with me. I even introduced him to my Oma this weekend. Had a bit of a break down talking with her on Saturday but what else is new. Love her to pieces but she of all people knows how to make me cry. It's not that she's doing it on purpose...We just have a connection and there are so many reasons that I cry around her. I guess I just feel safe there. I feel for Mike who has to sit through it.

OK...even typing that got me a little blurry eyed...crazy hormones lately. Again...not sure if it's me or the added hormones I'm taking...grumble grumble...exhausting process and all...least I'm sleeping better so that's a plus.

I guess that's it for a brain/emotion dump...and I have a Hearing about to start...fun fun times....ugh